The Poor Mom Revolution

     In the midst of all my previous blogs, you may have realized that I am no longer a teacher. I’ve made a couple hints to why leaving after 9 years was the best solution for me, but because I know so many people are in a similar boat of contemplating their profession, I’ll do a little bit more of a deep dive into my decision to making one of the hardest choices I’ve ever had to make.

     Let’s rewind a bit to where it all began. I was always drawn to babies and little kids for as long as I could remember. I was a mother’s helper and babysitter since I was 13 years old and I absolutely loved every moment of it. I’d play hide and seek, create drawings and imaginary worlds, we played card games and make concoctions in the kitchen with whipped cream and whatever else we could find. Not only was it good money, but it was really fun and I genuinely enjoyed it. To this day, I cherish all those memories and feel super old when those I babysit have now graduated high school and even college. Most importantly, the moms over the years who helped me with middle/ high school dramas, life advice and just helping to guide me along the way when I felt lost. I’m grateful to have kept in touch with so many of my mom friends and for those I haven’t just know how much of an impact you had on my life!

     Thanks to all the amazing experiences I’ve had, I knew that I wanted to work with kids. It started off with wanting to be a professional babysitter, probably due to loving the babysitter’s club. I remember my brother telling me that there was no such thing and that it wasn’t a real job, but I let him know that he was wrong and it woild be the best job ever! For a long time I wanted to own my own daycare center, while finally settling on becoming a teacher. I was consumed with this idea and in high school I enrolled in the child care class and brought the electronic baby home to make sure that it was fed, happy and taken care of. We got to do activities, lessons and arts and crafts projects with local preschool kids. I began looking at colleges that had early childhood centers and the rest was history. I went to college and dual majored in early/ elementary education. I had two absolutely amazing student teaching experiences in second and first grade in an urban and a rural setting. Both of my cooperating teachers were incredible role models that really set me up for success! I just knew that this was it… teaching was my end game and brought me such joy. 

     I’ve always been a people person because I care deeply, build connections, and let people know how much I care. I made it a point to really get to know my students and work hard to be a positive influence on their lives. Whether it was a fun science experiment, teaching one of my littles to read, dressing up as a Dr. Seuss character for book week, doing yoga after recess to calm and reset our minds, to singing Frozen at the top of our lungs to learn reading skills and especially the 1 on 1 chats in the hallway when we needed a break or have an emotional release. Every single one of those moments with every single child I’ve had has left a huge imprint on my heart. 

     The heartbreaking truth is that with every exciting moment and teacher win I had… There were tons of reasons that made me feel the opposite. On a given day, it could be a lack of support from the top down that made me feel unappreciated and completely on my own on some of the hardest days of my life. One parent harassed and threatened me for weeks before my cries for help were answered. It may have also  been the fact that so many schools had staff with a high school mentality that caused myself and co workers to get bullied, feel uncomfortable and ultimately ostracized to a point where hallways were avoided, staff lunch rooms were no longer an option and you felt alone. It could have been that my 8-hour work day was filled with crazy lessons, meetings and working on social skills that the majority of lesson planning and grading time went to after hours as well as into the evenings. I had spent endless hours outside of my standard work day that caused me to become burnt out, frustrated and severely underpaid. 

     Being a teacher was the most complicated profession. There were days and school years that I absolutely adored! The kids and atmosphere that made you want to get up and go to work every single day and then there were those days and years you looked for jobs every evening, contemplated your life choices and struggled to get up for work the next day. Ultimately the choice came down to the fact that “ teaching made me a bad mom!” There, I said it! When you work with 20 to 27 kids with extreme emotional and physical needs on a daily basis, it becomes mentally, physically and emotionally draining. The frustration that sets in when you work your butt off but constantly get more and more on your plate because that’s the life of a teacher. So much so that by the time I’d get home (to my own young children at the time) I was done! I was so over simulated and stressed that I did not want to be touched, I was irritable and had absolutely zero energy left to do what I wanted and needed for my own kids. This was the part that broke my heart every single day!

     Rewinding back to Summer 2019 after one of the craziest tax seasons my husband had worked. We’d both been feeling professionally defeated, not having the family time we truly wanted and absolutely no financial positives to show for it. He brought up the fact about moving back to Pennsylvania in the mountains where it’s a lot more quiet,  much cheaper and less stressful to live the life that we’ve been dreaming of. It didn’t take long for us to come up with a plan on how to make it work within the year. And that 2019 – 2020 school year was one of the best I ever had! I kept my boundaries and did as much work as I possibly could between 8-4 without taking a single thing home, I woke up happy and excited to go to work every single day, I ignored all the negativity around me to have the best classroom environment and lived in my happy bubble knowing that I was making the best choice for my family. 

     Within my 9 year teaching career, I worked at four different schools, five different grade levels, within an urban and suburban setting in a charter, private and public school. Let’s just say I made my rounds. Some of my school changes were based on circumstances outside of my control, some were out of necessity and others were because I was hunting for the environment I always dreamed of having where I could grow long term! Unfortunately, I found it extremely difficult… no matter what school, town, state or grade I was in. The choice to give up teaching took me forever to decide, but haven’t regretted a single moment of it. My goal and motto in life is to “find my happy” so if it isn’t working, I fix or change it. Many of us have grown up in a mentality that you get a job and stay with it for 30+ years until you retire. I’m not sure if that exists anymore. Working is part of your life for sure but sure as hell shouldn’t be your entire one or what your identity is built from. 

     These decisions are so hard to make and are for you and only you to decide when/if the time is right. Let’s just say a lot of people thought I was crazy, but unless their paying my bills and a part of me living my best life, I couldn’t care less. If you’re struggling, looking for a change and don’t know where to start… feel free to reach out! Sometimes it just takes talking it out to find out what you need!