Today I’m writing and posting this blog with a grateful heart. Every year my husband and I take a little kid free trip for our anniversary. We’ve been lucky enough to have family to allow this time for us to still be a couple and reconnect since we don’t have the opportunities to go out and date each other throughout the year. Our days are constantly filled with work, school and sports activities, managing schedules, supermarket trips, saving money, cleaning, frustration, nagging and stress. It’s so hard to find time together and allow ourselves to simply enjoy the beautiful life we’ve created. Things tend to become monotonous and we don’t get to appreciate each other as much as we’d like and everything we’ve accomplished over the last year let alone the decade!
We decided to take a trip that wasn’t crazy far and experience three adult only days in New Hope, Pennsylvania. We strolled hand in hand around Peddlers Village, walking in and out of stores, enjoying a hot cup of coffee while enjoying all the holiday lights and festivities. The last time we were there was with the kids and it definitely felt like we were there for the first time, seeing it through a different lens and savoring our much needed time together. We strolled down New Hope’s Main Street browsing through stores filled with clothing, antiques, and records. We thoroughly enjoyed food and drinks in the Ferry Market and finding just about every vegan friendly restaurant in the area. We held hands, gazed into each other’s eyes and talked about the impossible feat of growing up together. Reminiscing about the last 12 years of marriage and spending the last 20 years helping each other grow and reach each other’s goals.
My husband always says, “I married him for his potential.” I absolutely hate that saying even though I know he’s just trying to get a rise out of me… I think. I’ve loved him from the moment we became best friends. For all that he was and for our shared dream of what our future life would look like. I knew what I was getting myself into falling head over heels and knew we’d make it work even if we were polar opposites. So many people told us that we were too different to make it work. That we grew up so differently and we’d have a hard time agreeing to anything especially when it came to raising kids and parenting. I think constantly hearing that over the years made us push harder. It made us focus on our communication, our teamwork and ability to lean on each other, especially when it came to raising our kids. If I had to pick something, I’d say our parenting abilities are probably our biggest flex. We always have each other’s backs, pick up the slack when the other is struggling and no matter what, have our kids as the priority. No matter how life had beaten us down, we never slacked on showing up for our kids. We’ve raised two incredible kids that are kind, sweet, empathetic, caring, strong, resilient, happy, and emotionally aware. You can’t ask for anything else!
Looking back, I think the world knew we were meant for each other. No matter how much life threw at us, tried to pull us apart and challenge us, we held onto each other knowing we’d make it through. My husband is and will always be my best friend first. No matter how crazy life gets, how frustrated and nuts things become, how much we may drive each other insane, we focus on what’s important and figure it out together.
I think it’s easy to get caught up in the every day crazy. Running from one place to another and feeling like you can’t breathe or take a break. That mindset of sitting down and relaxing, taking some me time or a much needed break is a waste of time. Having your partner that can check each other and be aware when we need time alone is so valuable. The kids have also caught on as they watch and mimic what we do. They’ll both now tell us to sit and relax for a minute when they are aware we’re overwhelmed, tired or in need of a cup of tea or a good book. We’ve created a safe space to help each other when we notice one of us is struggling as it is hard to see what everyone else can.
One of the greatest things I’ve learned from our annual anniversary trip is that taking a step back with your partner to enjoy the peace and quiet is a necessity. To remember to reflect on all the amazing things you have achieved together and to look back so you can move forward.
Emily De La Torre is a marriage and Family Therapist I follow on Instagram. She has phenomenal information on simplifying parenting and creating a partnership with communication and teamwork worth cherishing. I came across one of her reels about reflecting on the past year with your partner to make it the best one yet. Over our many dates in New Hope this past week, I brought up a few of her questions and it was really incredible. The way we see things differently and how much what we each bring to the table is so vital to make it all work. Reflecting on what we did well this past year and what we still need to work on in 2025. All the ways we’ve supported each other personally, emotionally, and professionally and ways we may need a bit more during times of stress. Marriage and relationships are all about give and take and finding that middle ground and I’ll continue to put in the work for as long as I’m able. Below are some questions for you and your partner to talk about over the next few days. You won’t regret it!
•When did you feel the most loved by me this year?
•What’s one thing we’ve learned to appreciate more about each other this year?
•How have we supported each other’s goals this year and where can we are for more encouragement?
•What’s one thing you’d like to see more of in our relationship this year?
Family Focus
•Is there something you feel like we’ve handled really well as parents this year?
•What was the most challenging part of parenting for you in 2024?
•Are there any new skills or values you want to focus on as a family in 2025?
•How can I better support you in the parenting role?
Career and vocation
•What was the most rewarding part of your work this year?
•How did work challenge you and what did you learn this year?
• Is there something new you’d like to pursue or focus on in your career next year?
•How can I better support you in your professional goals in 2025?
Health
•How did you hear about your overall energy and mental health this year?
•Are there any positive health habits you’re proud of implementing this year?
•What’s one thing we can do together to stay healthier in the new year?
•What health habit are you most excited to work on individually in 2025?
Random
•What’s a favorite memory we created together this year?
•If you could relive one day from 2024, what would it be and why?
•What is something surprising you learned about yourself this year?
•What’s one adventure or goal we should tackle as a couple in 2025?
The Poor Mom Revolution 
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