The Poor Mom Revolution

One of the hardest concepts to teach children is money and I feel like it’s because home is the only place you’ll learn it. A long time ago, schools would teach budgeting and how to write a check, you’d learn about calculating tip based on percentages, but now you don’t get many lessons on it. I would have loved a budgeting for the real world class. A class on how to do taxes, what is a good car or house mortgage and payment. What is APR? How to use and manage credit cards and debt. How to invest and utilize the stock market. Is life insurance a thing you need, when should you start and how much is worth it. The important things many of us have had to deal with on a day to day or annual basis. Many of us find ourselves stressed, living paycheck to paycheck because we weren’t explicitly taught how to live and survive with all of the unwritten rules and expectations of our society and that come with adulting.

The kids have always gotten what they’ve needed, when we were struggling and when we were doing well. We always took them to get those new shoes, jacket, school supplies and snacks, you know the necessities. When the kids would ask to get lunch or go out to dinner that night. My husband and I would talk about needs and wants. We needed to get you ___, but we want to ___. Sometimes we do both and get all the things, and other times we can only do one. The kids are kids and get upset or disappointed from time to time, but they get it. They start to ask for something and then catch themselves. We spent the whole day out, we probably can’t go to Wawa. We then decide as a team… we want a coffee too so let’s get smoothies! It creates a space where we aren’t always the one feeling like we have to say no all the time, because the kids understand we aren’t made of money and they get so many things. I was never sure how to be a parent when I started, but I love how grateful and understanding they can be. We must be doing something right.

I’ve spoken before about the kids Debit card called greenlight. We use it to add money for them whether it’s birthday, holiday or tooth fairy payments. They also get some for chores that are above and beyond. It’s necessary for them to clean their rooms, pick up their items from around the house and get their lunch/clothes/backpack for school. The bathroom, loading and unloading the dishwasher, folding clothes, sweeping/mopping common areas are additional and appreciated so we work towards a weekly “allowance.” This is money they can use in whatever way they want. They calculate what they need and how many weeks they’ll need to save in order to get what they want. I have one that saves and saves for something that really excites him and another that has money burning a hole in her pocket. Both allow them to see the money go in and out and are constantly figuring out, if I spend this, then I’ll have this remaining to determine whether it is worth it or not.

We started this shopping trip last year, and want to continue the tradition. It allowed the kids to learn a budget and stay within it. They get to make choices of wanting vs needing, and choose between two things they might really like, but want one over the other. The kids get $50 loaded onto their cards for the new school year. We went into the Salvation Army and looked at the colors of the day. The two colors are 50% off and another is $0.99. The kids get to pick out t-shirts, long sleeve, sweaters and sweatshirts, pants that they like and have to calculate the total. They get the autonomy to choose, the independence to spend how they’d like and helps them to create their own style. I can also guarantee that they’ll wear the items as opposed to choosing it for them. We can’t spend $500 on back to school clothes at regular stores or spend the $20-25 at Target and Old Navy per jeans or sweater for the kids every season. This allows us to all get what we need without having to choose between our other monthly necessities.

I love teaching life skills. I used to do it within my classroom and I don’t think I’ll ever stop. Teaching practical skills that kids will need is so important. When we were just about done shopping, my son asked if he could go pay at the register by himself. After I told him yes, since he had the card and was more than capable, he started to panic and asked me what he needed to do. We went through the conversation and did a quick role play of what it would look like. The cashier will say “Hi. How are you?” He then said, “I’m good. How are you?” I mentioned to place the items on the table and the hangers to the left. Once she calculated the total, you hand her your card and sign for it. I have never seen him so proud of himself. These are the things that I look forward to within all the crazy. As much as they can all drive me nuts, teaching them to be adults is such a proud moment for me.

I sometimes wish there was an easy way to know if you’re doing it all right, but for now I’m just doing the best I can. This is the best way i’ve learned to teach budgeting, money smarts and real world expectations. We’ll see how it goes.

Greenlight Debit Card. With the money app and debit card for kids and teens, we can send our kids money instantly, assign chores, and teach them to earn, save, and invest. https://share.greenlight.com/122970918